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FM
Former Member

 

anyone got any ideas

 

I absolutely HATE my neighbours. HATE THEM!!! They are like living next door to victor meldrew, infact he even looks like him.

 

I think im quite a good neighbour, i dont have parties, i never play music, i keep the house in a good state, i never have loads of people arriving at all times of day. The neighbour on the other side of me (an old lady) is so lovely and i look out for her, take her mail in, give her xmas pressies etc but the other side i HATE!!!

 

They are totally unreasonable, telling kids off for playing in snow outside (young kids making a snowman i may add) They came out and tell me that i cant wash my car 'there' (outside my house) and when challenged threaten to 'knock you out'. 

 

The sort of people that the min you move your car they come out and steal your parking space all for the benefit of moving up ONE car. (they did this today when i went to the postoffice for 5 mins) They are quite insane. and i reckon its about time i started to be the neighbour they deserve!!!

 

I swear if i win the lottery im going to keep this house and rent it out to the roughest family i can find

Replies sorted oldest to newest

ohhh ants we have an abundance of ants round here

 

and yes, hes off again. Today they have put plastic over the drain (that we share its underneath the fence) so that my water cant go down it, so i have gone out with a craft knife and sliced off the bit that is in my side of the garden and moved their car into the space i had just moved out of on their way to get the bus

FM
Originally Posted by Gypsie~:

ohhh ants we have an abundance of ants round here

 

and yes, hes off again. Today they have put plastic over the drain (that we share its underneath the fence) so that my water cant go down it, so i have gone out with a craft knife and sliced off the bit that is in my side of the garden and moved their car into the space i had just moved out of on their way to get the bus

zazz

Yeah the knock you out incident was reported to the police but it wasnt me he said it to directly. and unfortunately the sun is there side so any big trees i plant will just rob me of light.

 

THey are so so anal, they had a go at the postman once because he stepped over their wall instead of opening the gate and then closing the gate again. The wall is all of 2 foot high and the garden completely paved

FM

1..Flaming shit bag..get a dog poo or any poo put it in a paper bag and put it on their doorstep..light it, ring the bell and run....watch from a distance as he comes out and stamps the flames out....

 

2..Clout nails..take 2..1 inch clout nails put one directly infront of the rear tyre and one directly behind the rear tyre that way you can't miss, remove spare when he leaves..takes around 3 days for the tyre to go down and the head wears away so no evidence is left....

 

3..Oil..get some old engine oil and when his car is directly outside his house go out and poor a bit under the front of his car..it will drove him mental trying to find where his oil leak is coming from....

 

4..Sign him up for every annoying thing that comes through as junk mail..Doctors surgery's are good places to find such crap....

stonks
Originally Posted by stonks:

1..Flaming shit bag..get a dog poo or any poo put it in a paper bag and put it on their doorstep..light it, ring the bell and run....watch from a distance as he comes out and stamps the flames out....

 

2..Clout nails..take 2..1 inch clout nails put one directly infront of the rear tyre and one directly behind the rear tyre that way you can't miss, remove spare when he leaves..takes around 3 days for the tyre to go down and the head wears away so no evidence is left....

 

3..Oil..get some old engine oil and when his car is directly outside his house go out and poor a bit under the front of his car..it will drove him mental trying to find where his oil leak is coming from....

 

4..Sign him up for every annoying thing that comes through as junk mail..Doctors surgery's are good places to find such crap....

oOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOh you're good at this

Soozy Woo
Originally Posted by KaffyBaffy:
Originally Posted by erinp:

wind chimes


Oh.. that wins for me.   What kind of evil thought of them....

I love to hear wind chimes ,my neighbour not so much.

She did mention to me that she could hear mine throughout the night ,she is a light sleeper ,she also sleeps with her window slightly opened.

I had no idea that this was a problem ,I took mine down immediately,she is such a good neighbour.

Had she not been......  

FM
Originally Posted by erinp:

wind chimes

Flapping tarpaulin

 

Leylandii

 

If they're a football, royal wedding fan etc, be sure to mow or strim the lawn when whatever they like is on, if they've got terrestrial TV the mower or strimmer is bound to cause incessant electro/mechanical interference. 

 

Churn up soil a bit and pour small mounds of earth directly over and liberally all over the garden on a regular basis that will give the impression of mole hills.  Watch in amusement as they go out and buy poisons, traps and those mole deterring windmill things (the more expensive the better) for no reason.

 

 

 

 

Carnelian

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