The bloody KFC MEGA BUCKET !!!

 

Do me a favour - its tiny

 

Is this a case of media men exaggerating again?

The tv volume going up when the ads come on, don't know about anyone else but I turn the sound down so it's wasted on me.

The morning rush hour.

 

Almost no one wants to be there - so why do we all do it?

 

Can't we all just agree to another hour in bed?

All being well St. Renton, I am doing that on your behalf tomorrow.

And trying to influence the sayings of the nation - Scott Mills (Radio 1) will not stop.

Another one he is trying,

"Bore off"

 

Should be "grow up"

"Big Issue Sir?"

"No thank you" (Politely)

"OK have a nice day" when you know they're thinking "Tight bastard"

 

People who say "can I get" whatever in take away places instead of "can I have".

 

Above all - People with NO MANNERS.

 

Please and thank you cost nothing.

And people repeating things fast to make it seem like they are actually saying more than they are.

Graham Norton is the perfect example.

And saying err to pad out a bucket load of crap - Nick Grimshaw does this (Radio1) 

Over here they are called RIOTERS

 

Over there they are called PROTESTERS

Its like...one mans terrorist is another mans freedom fighter...

I just heard this on a footie commentary on telly...

Usually the phrase is 6 of one and half a dozen of the other...

Now been modified too...6 of one and two threes of another

Footie comments are legendary

Chris Kamara is great

 

Walking past our local florist I couldn't help but notice that they had a Valentine's window display.

Secondly, remember that article I wrote in the early nineties about a spoof TV prog called "celebrity car parking!" Tonight, a day after splash, we arrive at celebrity ski-jumping. Get down to Ladbrokes whilst you can still get 15/8.

And who is on that Celeb Skiing?

 

Bloody SINita !!! Bloody virus that won't go away

STOP telling me how many calories are in my Kit Kat!!

 

It's emblazened on the front

 

Just seen an advert for the TV show The Last Leg which features clips from the show highlighting the range of guests you are likely to see.

 

At the end is one final clip where Russell Brand turns to another guest/regular and shouts "I'm going to kiss you so hard".

 

This is not funny, it's dated and feels so old now. Running out of ideas Mr Brand, I think so. Dreadful. Put me right off the show in that one clip.

 

 

CHEVRONS - reducing a two lane road into a one lane bottle neck.

 

WHY???

Because they can

My mam has always said "6 and two 3s"

We also say "six and two threes".

Seems I am the odd-one-out then

Bloody 'wing suits'

 

Ok - ok, we've seen them, we know what they do.

Floating down in a suit with flaps.

Enough already !!!!

And bloody Sea King bloody helicopter rescues.

On a winch.

We know, ok. Seen it a  million times.

Stop showing us like its never happenend before !!!!

And bloody slow motion lion attacks on poor bloody zebras, wilde beasts and poor bloody Thompson's bloody gazelles!!!

 

We've seen it - stoppitt !!!

banal game shows...................kill me now

That flippin' Dan Snow 

I love history programmes but he bores the @rse off me.

Pictures on food packets/boxes with (for example) 2 biscuits on a plate with the caption underneath:

"Serving Suggestion"

I KNOW HOW TO PUT A BISCUIT ON A PLATE FFS!

Abernethy?

 

Adverts!

 

It's not about haircare anymore, it's 'intelligent' haircare. More stupid marketing speak.

 

When I watched the advert for Libitere yoghurt, the guy takes a spoonfull of yoghurt yet despite having a nicely crafted mount of yoghurt, the underside of the spoon is immaculately clean - Impossible...

 

Football

Waiting for the bliddy game to finish so we can go shopping .

Children who stare

 

No leg room on aeroplanes

 

Clothes sizing variations

 

Nothing being built to last anymore

Yes, that one gets me too. I normally stare back 

That will put the at ease...not .

It's not meant to, It's meant to get them to go away, or if it's on a bus,turn round and sit down 

Canvassers in the street with clipboards

 

Slit-like spectacles

 

Neck tattoos

 

 

I also hate street canvassers with neck tattoos who wear slit-like spectacles.

 

 

 . . .and smarty pants

 

Hope that helps

News reports from Syria (and the like) where another crisis is reported.

Cue lots of people standing in front of TV cameras crying for assistance and saying they are being 'slaughtered'.

Truth be told these are the dissedents/protestors/terrorists that started the whole thing in the hope of seizing power ... and lost to Gov forces.